Thursday, July 29, 2010

Great love-- distance gifts.....

Just came across,
which has the cutest gift ideas for long-distance loves.

Check out these pillow cases - one for each of you!

I like this body pillow, too....
Just not sure if I'd be ready to give this bad boy away:)

The Man List

A few months ago, my girls came over for one of our weekly potlucks, and the topic of men, boyfriends, ALL came up!  A powerful chica in the crew threw out the idea of the MAN LIST, which a few of the other girls had created and edit when needed. 

This is a great chance to figure out what's important to me in terms of a relationship.  For so long, I had been caught up in championship men that looked great on paper, but did less than the very best in the actual relationship (actually, quite sub-par).

So right then and there, we made my man list....what I wish for in a guy.  It's not in concrete, and as I grow, so, hopefully, will the list!
  1. Intellectually stimulating
  2. good foundation
  3. stable
  4. family oriented
  5. Christian
  6. caring
  7. proud of me
  8. adventurous
  9. provider
  10. protector
  11. a good man
  12. ambitious
  13. a good sense of the human spirit (knows how to treat people)
  14. knows what the right thing to do is
  15. proactive
  16. passionate about life
  17. courageous
  18. curious
  19. open-minded
  20. healthy
  21. athletic

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Chasing love....even if it lands me in Canada

The exchange rate of living in Canada just went up. Way up.
Emotions are at peak value these days :)
Continuing the saga (and joy!) of cross-border love,

Here's my short story....or novella, as it may turn out....

I chatted a short while ago about how I met the Polar Bear online.
It was a GREAT introduction (click here for the background),
and we totally hit it off...and been going strong ever since.
Best thing since blueberry muffins (which I absolutely LOVE!)

Then....some news.....
He had been on the job hunt for a while, months, actually
had some successes, but nothing really GREAT panned out...
until he had an interview last Tuesday (a week ago, can u believe it?!!?!?)
in Toronto

And on Wednesday, he got the job offer.
This was fantastic, deliciously sweet music!

Until I heard that there was one stipulation.
He had to start immediately.
On Wednesday, I bawled, brawled, and cried till I was sore
(all over pizza and pinot grigio).
On Thursday, I pulled it together
and started the Exel sheet listing all the stuff to get done before his move.
(Such an A-type, right?!!?!?)
On Friday, I rolled over the big suitcase.
On Saturday, we took pictures of his house to post online
(hope he gets some tenants soon!!!)
On Sunday, we had a beautiful breakfast and planned the rest of our weekends.

I'm not the biggest fan of long distance relationships.
Too lonely.
Too expensive.
Too worrisome.
But love's not easy - if it were, everyone would have it, right?

So, for now, he rests his head in Toronto,
but, more importantly,
he rests his heart with me.
And that's alright.

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Online Dating...Catching the Big Fish

July's cross-border romance theme continues......

I moved to Canada in April 2009 and was having the hardest time meeting people (men, particularly in Ottawa). I was in grocery stores, lounges, book stores, coffee shops, churches, parks, and it took me months to realize that men don't court ladies here like they do in the golden south.
No genuinely sweet compliments from gentlemen passing by. No smooth approaches to share some friendly conversation over a drink. No flattering stares from across the room, street, bus, or aisle. As Canada's capital, Ottawa is a government town, so guys that'd be in my target audience (age, intellect, goals, etc.) are either:

  • Settled with familes
  • Interning (not that this is a bad thing - it's just that the career is the only reason they'd be in town, and they wouldn't be likely to stay....)
  • Too involved with politics to pick up what I'm puttin' down
So........I decided to go online to find my guy. At first, I bought a subscription to, and that was just AWFUL! The guys were old, too hood to be any good, and baby's daddies 2 or 3 times over. Not the cream of the crop.

After hearing from some friends about other popular options, I tried Plenty of Fish, and I WAS HOOKED!!!! So POF is international, and there are soooooooo many folks on here - it was so much fun to meet so many eligible gents - that were HERE, in OTTAWA! I would've never known.
So many friends tell me that they are too fearful to try it...insecure about who might be reading their most intimate details, and just not ready to make that leap into dating subculture.
Ladies, if you're single, and don't want to be, please....please give this a try. I was a bit nervous about it at first, but when I realized that you can put just enough info out there to bait the hook, I landed the biggest fish, and it was soooooooo worth it!

It's not really online dating....because the online stuff is just the start. It's more like online choosing - you choose the person you want to date from a pool of guys that are already interested in you. To me, it's the absolute best because it's free (in most cases), convenient, and you don't have to wear your cutest dress and most painful shoes only to be disappointed at the end of an evening of meeting the wrong kind of guys.
I crafted my profile very carefully - it took a few rounds, but I finally got it right. I wanted to talk about me but still leave some mystery, know what I mean? So I tried to describe my priorities, my life, and myself in terms of something I love: travel!

After fishing for about 2 months (filled with fun and exciting dating!), I met the Polar Bear. We exchanged messages on the site for a week or so before we graduated to the phone. After another week, we went out on our first date, and it was a wrap after that! We've been together for eight months now (still learning great things about each other!), and I'm really happy. Really happy - and it's not just romance. It's the partnership, mutual concern for each other's well being, and commitment to adding to each other's happiness.

Before the online discovery, I was just out there - not knowing what to look for, and surely not knowing what it could look like. Online dating sites open the door to so many possibilities - for my single ladies, I hope you'll give it a try - I cosign on this one!!!